I coulda been a mentor I coulda been a fancy pants I coulda been inventor I coulda been quite the man Coulda been two places at one time Coulda been Alabama’s unique mind I coulda captured your essence with my oil pen Coulda rapped your presence with it baked in Coulda made my peace and set the tone right Coulda been here long before my own type I coulda dug down deeper to the Stone Age I coulda put on meat but I’m still bony I coulda been a healer I coulda been the antidote I coulda been steering clear of I coulda been on my own Coulda been big muscles for the Big Top I coulda had some knowledge to drop I coulda been correct to want to rewind I coulda had respect, philoso-fee-fy I coulda left out the fo-fum for no fun I coulda finished the fabled ray gun I coulda set the tone and laid it all down I coulda made you think that’s how I am now But I’m still funky!

Not used to bein’ a star but used to be in a star Come so far down the line from Tartakovsky to Tarr Step into portal, leave it open and your door is ajar Step Into Liquid and you miss me and you know who you are Shake your money maker, make it real cartoony! Like a blue igloo-ie I’d like to see you sue me You’re never getting’ to me Ya neva neva gonna You’re not a caped crusader, gotta be a better motivator Gotta make an offer with the proper payment So make a joke and shake it off Ya play the beat like Tawl Ross Ya oughtta shop at Long & Tall Stop shoppin’ at Ross! We were there for my mother We made a web and I love her A memory with my brother An adventure like no other And now I got a pension and a Penny Bank, many thanks Anyway, it’s ok, but it’s a bit relaxed Cinemax, party packs, my fancy candle wax I would adapt but no adept at making a home for a kitty cat So I detach what I’ve been working at You know I’m not bad at that! But I’ll get into it and make it out I’m kinda makin’ me proud I’m tired of takin’ it down Tired of pitchin’ from the mound Sometimes I sing it from the heart Sometimes I speak it from the mouth I think I’ll go down south and take a meeting with my penny pal I’ll take it anyhow at any amount I can’t imagine what an animal is thinkin’ about When they get fifty thousand kids and men and women around Like in a stadium when everyone is stompin’ the ground Steppin’ aside, stuck in the crowd, steep in the climb Stoppin’ for tea time Put it all down Take a bull to the ground! You’re another stacked actor, pullin’ like a tractor Trappin’ everyone like that guy from Max Factor Capture their hearts and their minds like Anne Baxter Tappin’ the drums right in time like Chad Sexton Zappa becomes friend of mine, I can imagine Magic genie inside like I’m Aladdin I’m allowed in here, I brought my special pass And I got the passion that begat a round about the world I’m about to hurl from the flashin’ Been drinkin’ from the cask If you call the operator she’ll hang up on your real fast You have to ask if you wanna see a copy of the pass You have to bask in the moment when you know you’re in demand You have to last if you wanna write the ending of the book You have to laugh ‘cause you gave up and that’s when you found the hook I’m just kittin’ like Jason, my best friend Jason Remember when we had the big parties in your basement? And everyone wanted to be part – to our amazement Created an elaborate plan to get our favorite ladies to the couch Oh man, those were the days! Oh yeah, the memories.... Oh damn, I gotta peace Alanis and Alice McManus and Elvis Tyranno-sorullitos, I’m cuttin’ out the meat though So let’s see if I make it ‘cause last time was kinda weak You’re J-Bird, you got a beak I’m LT, I got a beak I gotta be somewhere round about Quarter To Three Come with me if you want, we’re going just down the street We gotta be real discreet, I got someone to meet TaeKwondo, Tay Zonday, and Tae Cudezi Takin’ on the best of me and let’s just make it easy Take a look around the room and you can see completely That there’s a lot of room to move and I believe you need me Put it all down Take a bull to the ground!

I’m workin’ 9 to 5 like Dolly Parton I’m where Dolly Sheep meets Dalai Lama Is that Jane Fonda? (No, it’s Lily Tomlin) Oh, that’s...Madonna? (It’s Rosie O’Donnell!) For someone that can never recall Academy actors anyway What has all of that got to do with anything? I can set up anything I can delegate a king I can celebrate the spring I can elevate a singer Go to hell like I’m a sinner I’m a hell of a beginner I can tell you that I smell what you’ve been cookin’ up for dinner I can sell you something terrible and have it ship delivered I can have a clean bill of health Acclaim Bill Withers Bill Withers – Beak Boiled, Plucked Up Duck Feathers Ahhh, Bada bada bing Bada bada boom Batter batter swing, you two better get a room Gotta get a set of better clubs with tiny knobs Better get back to the 9 to 5, here come Roz Gonna depend a new plan on a coin toss Gotta get out of fantasy land like you’re in Oz They’re gonna demand the “damn the man” cause Better say yes, just only yes, to the Boss Siskel and Ebert gave me four thumbs up So I turned on the mic to give ‘em more dumb stuff Spent all my life behind an old dump truck While holdin’ the golden Holy Grail cup A 9 to 5, you say dass wassupp Cashin’ a paycheck but you can’t match up Crushin’ tomatoes make you say ketchup Pilot a plane but you don’t make enough Pilate – the game if you can find a flaw Hypotheses, postulate, law Maimonides, Socrates, Jaws Testosceles’ obsolete song Sobieski, Absolut, gone Not for nothing, I could eat more Got to make out fortunate for the poor who can’t afford a Ford Taurus Oh wait, that’s me But my feet, they fall forward Take a step back, you’re still equaling nowhere Disparity is disturbing to despair The financial gap is wider than the Delaware What did Dela wear? Idaho, but Alaska! She Rhode the whole Island? (What a ho/what a bastard!) Take a few laps and you’ll finally pass her But could you go a little bit faster? You’ve got a place I haven’t been to Since you’ve been there I have been giving hints and clues and Prisencolinensinainciusol And I gather you’ve been itchin’ too and Savin’ the date and I got into doin’ Everything I can do to prevent ruin Stakin’ a claim and I can answer true and Makin’ it plain and I provide the proof I wrap a tighter loop and send it right to you I came alive and grew I got a lot to lose The “Good afternoons” The clean, tidy rooms I’ll kill the golden goose and take a loan or two I’m comin’ over, boo I got a show to do I’m gonna grow on you I’m gonna make you swoon You better make some room, I’m gonna be there soon You better count on down until the baby boom

I was at exactly the right place at the right time I had my eyes open, and my ears open, and mind I said, “Wouldn’t that be great if this turned into some kind of opportunity?” And it actually did become mine So I decided to lend a helping hand, you never know Before I knew, I was in demand And so far so good Imagine that! Being a helpful person with good attitude, good service And good atmosphere, good purchasing Gold medals to the Murchison Good come to those deservin’ it But then you start to hurt from it and.... Go back in time, you’d be alright for a while And you can’t believe the message ever made it to me Walk a few blocks and make your arrival And kick a tin can into Pan Alley, G Being followed by a coyote behind me and I don’t even mind it In fact, I’m kind of excited by it I might get bited by it and then I might die by it And then I won’t have to be trying I’m not inspired, I’m tired of it I wanna ride a wave or ride away from here Where brighter days are near And Rodney Dangerfield is just a name I hear And not a neighbor dear I want a labor career I’ll take my label off and disappear Get back in time in a while Hey! That’s a cool style! Alright! “Whatchu been up to man?” Learning to fly Look around and see everything that I predicted But there’s something missing I need in my life Hind sight is unkind I was so close I was blind Mistaking gold for a coal mine Paying a dollar for a dime Polishing just shy of the shine All of my shadows were combined Didn’t know at the time but couldn’t hold out Goodnight And now....

Don’t you just love it here, baby?! Welcome to the place to be 1,2,3 third rock from the sun It’s such a breeze, so jet here Just take a left at Mercury, then take your orders from General Relativity We got what you need to get here – the gravity Should be gentle ride but if you’re scared, grab a knee Come on in, the atmosphere’s fine You can take a dip in the cherry wine You can take a hit from the multiplier You can take a swing on Tarrzan’s wire You can settle down and lounge by the fire in the arms of your loved one Don’t compare Not prepared for the love we share Greatest maker of in the Universe If you need a moment, go rehearse Trapped in that black hole was the worst But I can restart here like it’s my first Feel love for the one that gave you birth Go find all the things that you feel are worth it Found a paradise here, you deserve it Fightin’ for your right, then you reserve it The Universe is a beautiful turf but I’ll never forget what I made on Earth Made out like a bandit caught red-handed How’d I get so lucky? Can’t comprehend it Standin’ On The Verge of my funky planet Wrote a crazy ad and then they ran it Got it gratis, went bananas Getting’ all around on Chutes and Ladders Lookin’ through the microscope at the lattice Whatchu know about Gladys? Nobody can tell you what you matter You got the power, don’t worry about Shatner You’re not a coward, you’re not a damn actor You’re the real thing with your bold reaction Energy made in a cold reactor Benefit played with a total matcher Found a Monet in a trash compactor Find a new way, no benefactor Been a minute Betcha cannot bend a metal rod with your mind, better off Didn’t pass it on when I was young, now I got a green thumb I can plant a seed and trace it all back to the sun Don’t you just love it here, baby?! Welcome to the world we made It’s ok if you wanna stay, I made a place for you to lay I love your face – if you don’t mind, I wanna gaze I could be kissing it all day But I’ll say, I got it all under control babe, don’t play I got a call from Don, going on Soul Train I’m at the mall and I’m hearing John Coltrane Steven Seagal was not even on cocaine Willie DuBois was all feeling, all hoping All joking aside, I wanna jump in Listen to Show Pan And jump up like Yao Ming I find it quite astounding – amount of pennies surrounding the pretty, cool fountain I took ‘em to accounting and found the amount was not enough to pay the Groundlings I called Robert Downey and said, “The Brownian Motion fits to my quotient to help describe days of our lives” This dark energy is decidedly hate, and I’d rather be great Now brother, behave, don’t run the debate And I’ll Bartle-be late When you get to the wrap party, look out for me with the capital T Lane Tarr – Bidi bom, bidi bidi bom I want a Backstage Betty for the Pettibone I wanna crack this stage with a baseball bat And take it back to the running man and lay him on the mat I wanna solve Dark Matter without lookin’ at data Once you get her then you got her but gotta keep gettin’ better Don’t forget to give a little – living as a trend setter You go back to the sun and visit as a Transcender Don’t you just love it here, baby?!

If you were here today you’d probably be a household name HILLEL SLOVAK Whoa! Back up, long ago 1984 in California Started something we all know And when the good die young they don’t have time to grow All it would take is one listen to Behind The Sun To know where you would go I can just imagine the magic and passion we’d have if you were here today If you were here today you’d probably be a household name BRAD NOWELL Truest definition of a diamond in the rough We know you had the lovin’ but we didn’t get enough And people practice for a lifetime to put in a fraction you had into a single line Imagine if you had been refined You’d have the whole world crying Wouldn’t be singing just hits, we’d be singing your classics It seemed to me you didn’t know what you were doing But you did it naturally, and that’s exactly why it grew into its own kind of spirit Can feel it, can hear it A million try to copy you and none of ‘em come near it I love you and I wish that you had left us with some more ‘Cause if you were here today, who knows what we woulda been in for? Such a crying shame Wish you were here today If you were here today you’d probably be a household name CARL SAGAN – My man! If I could have dinner with anyone, dead or alive, who would it be? That was never an easy question to answer for me All the businesses, all philanthropists, all the musicians, mathematicians, impossible missions Leaders and heroes, good deeds and a myriad of even the merest of these, an appearance of ease And you’re curing disease and addressing the needs of the peasants and peons And speaking on eons and epochs and ages and plagues that raged And the ways we were saved, God made a mistake when he took you away You had this way to explain and teach and articulate You brought the greatest change to my straining brain You taught me how to take an idea and then demonstrate The world needs you more than ever! We better remember to center attention on the mental capacity You passed to me a teaching that is lasting me Remembering you classically We love you ever after, C!

Throw it in the fire The name of desire’s what makes me wanna be quiet And I can’t deny it even when I’m lying Gotta be compliant when you look through my file And all the while the time is drifting away like it’s Dobie Gray (Like it’s in the Nile) Me and my brother Kyle can’t concentrate ‘cause it’s wild It’s loud! The sound in the crowd, it’s out Wow! I’m ‘bout to move now This town went down I’ll roam around for solid ground What’s that sound? “You’re surrounded! Yo, check out this take-down” Listen, I got no use for causing trouble So turn around, don’t burst your bubble Don’t wanna riot, don’t wanna rumble Graduation day, stole my joke, said, “Be humble” Set the example, set me down, send me a bundle Send me bouquet, send me some pay, a semi-circle Cirque Du Delay, circa 1980, circumference cutie Send me a due date CD instead of Blu-Ray Don’t like-a to wait I hate to specu-too-late So check your shoelace before you shatter your face Shoppin’ at Champs Elysees Never shop at such a spot ‘cause my pockets are pretty greasy Cellar door is nevermore the most aesthetically pleasing – it’s “pretty greasy” Came up with that like 15 years ago and I finally have a chance to release it One of these days I’ll give it up, for Pete’s sake Hey, you wanna meet me for a slice of pizzae? This is one of the worst raps in history Switching! This is an open invitation, I hope you call in for more information ‘cause I’d love to hear from you, baby! So why don’t you fill out your application? I’ll be there at the station vibrating when you arrive, sitting in a soft-top, waiting, anticipating the permanent vacation, we’re starting the celebration! I got the patience to make it through the hibernation. We gettin’ to the communicating, we getting’ to the debating, we getting’ to the hardcore dating, we goin’ all kinds around about the scene. Pullin’ a rabbit out your dress, we need a rapid pass, you gonna wrap me up tight when you’re holdin’ me to your breast, we gonna make a giant mess, we gonna raise up our breath, you gonna tell me things, I’m gonna make a suggestion and sneak you into the restroom, come on baby now! The future might call me

If there’s a woman I love I wear my heart on my back A million times I turn around, I still don’t know where it’s at I’m like a dog chasing my tail, re-enact, re-enact I might be cool, I might be calm, I might be confident, Mack If there’s a woman I love I put my heart on a-tack A million times I turn it out, I gotta block out the fact The kind of love that make me better Kind that keep me in tact The kind that’s written in a letter and not written me back And I might never adapt It feels so large what I lack I got a charge from my bank that said I overdrew that What I had, all I have They want the rest of my tank But I said thanks, ‘cause there’s something that nobody can grab Got my love, got my heart, got my brain and my part I got this way to make you think about the person you are Sittin’ parked in my car after coming so far Sometimes the hardest things are simple and the right ones are hard If there’s a woman I love We gotta be on a team But there’s nobody representin’ here, nobody but me You change your name or I’ll do mine You keep your identity, ‘cause it’s the real you I see You keep reminding me what I don’t need to be reminded of I know you to be all the love I keep inside I keep it right where I need You’re doing right by me, I hold a tight belief You were the right relief when I needed to be free And now you’ve come to me and said you’d love to be That’s all you said You only had to say you’d love to be And I said yes, only yes Understood completely And I never have to say please believe me

I got championship rings And my heart, it sings Climb up off the couch Climb into the reigns Come down from the clouds Come in from the rain Go down for the count, then wink – just playin’ So now that I’m allowed to speak, I’m Lane Go crazy! Go buck wild. Go check yourself Take a picture Make it bigger I’m the singer I wanna sing now, hit record! Check this out Check the score Bigger than anyone I’ve ever known or seen before Ok, maybe not Jim Henson, but the rest of ‘em....yeah ‘Cause I’m audacious Pretentious Vocabularacious The tabuloid celluloid gonna sell me in pages Pink Floyd is annoyed that I stole their big pigs from their cages Chris Lloyd can avoid the future – I can replace it The Vicodin face’ll be wiped from the dangers Dependency is an enemy to all the races So erase it – we gotta make it how we want it What’s so funny? Well what’s your big idea, you funkadummy? I ain’t no activist I took a crack at this but I need to practice Maybe I’m off-axis but I know the fact is I was made to rock Maybe I wasn’t made for a lot But I know that if you give me a shot that I can surely make your funky head nod Hit it with the rock! Rockin’ and rollin’, I’m rockin’ around the clock ‘til every funky heart is stolen Rock drop and roll, pop/rock explode, (gibberish) Stop rockin’ the boat, breakin’ rocks in the hot sun, rock steady uhh It’s a rock-til-you-drop shopping extravaganza, don’t miss out! Sitting in the drop-top at a place that I loved He said, “Hit it with the rock” I checked in the glove box He said, “Hand me that one right there and then be prepared You never heard nothing like this come through your tiny ears” I said, “But I’m not even supposed to be here” Didn’t know I would remember that moment for the rest of my years A great moment! The kind that changes your gears! The kind that makes you wanna share what you just learned with your peers The kind that shapes you and shows you where your life could be steered I chose it Not sure how smart, and I know that part I got hit with the rock like someone shot me with a poison dart I never knew you could feel that cool just sittin’ in someone’s car It’s like God was hanging out prizes and had one for Lane Tarr But it was a while before I even did anything to take a start I thought it would just come to me I didn’t know that you had to work hard I thought I would find a golden chariot just sittin’ in a junk yard I didn’t do the work I didn’t put in time I’m on a path with destiny and everything’ll just fall in line I was just stalling – why? Maybe I was a cocky kid who took it as a given to fly But I hadn’t even given it the slightest try I didn’t deserve to be heard but I took it as a damning slight I was almost 30 before I even began to learn to manage life I can’t imagine myself as any other type And I’ve created my own chance to give it back and hit you with the rock if you like Hit it with the rock! Rockin’ and rollin’, I’m rockin’ around the clock ‘til every funky heart is stolen Rock drop and roll, pop/rock explode, (gibberish) Stop rockin’ the boat, breakin’ rocks in the hot sun, rock steady uhh Woman, take me in your arms, rock your baby! Nevermind, I decided to still rhyme I still got time to give it up, I give it what I got I cannot stop Can you save a dying world from this funkless spot? (Miss Muffett’s got) (Stuffing stock) (Come in hot) (Mumford’s shot) (Running clock) (Jungle rot) (Uncle stop) Something’s not quite as good as it could be And I think you know what When you gon’ die, lie in the mud and think about your return to Shambala Something’s not quite as good as it could be And I think you know what

Who’s to say that I have? Who’s to say that I haven’t? There’s only one file kept in the cabinet Now stay away from that powerful magnet It could erase all your personal data You could go back to the map and point at it A place in time when you’re sure that you had it You could get back there on the next rapid plane You tell the world and you’re really emphatic You could be dancefloor tearing the wrap party You could be there but you’ll have to imagine You might be tearing jeans on the scaffolding Carry valise like you carry your ladder But it’s a brighter day for a softened king Who found that life on the throne is no better You blow them all away and you’re quite something You fly away ‘cause you’re light as a feather But people like turning day into night They may open your file and send it to the shredder You could say that’s why you’re only running in place You could say life’s like a box, so go get her!